“Gentleness is part of being feminine - part of being a woman, and God made us distinctly different from men on purpose!”
~ Melanie Chitwood ~

Sometimes it takes something like a big old whack on the head with the truth to open my eyes, and sometimes I need just a gentle reminder. These words hit home for me in so many ways, they have been on my heart and in my mind for quite some time now, I guess I just needed to hear someone else say it to bring it to the forefront.

Once again, it would be way too easy to blame my circumstances for my attitude. Although it’s true that raising 6 children in such a small house is overwhelming, frustrating and . . . well . . . clausterphobic, that is no excuse to be as edgy as I always seem to find myself these days. There are many more excuses such as that one that I could list, but I won’t because it is pointless.

God gave me my wonderful husband and sons and he made me the only female in this house for a reason - whether I understand it or not. I cannot lose my femininity in the midst of it all and like the quote says gentleness is a huge part of being a woman. There are two sides to this quote for me.

Gentleness as a Mother: It has been dwelling somewhere in the back of my mind that I need to respond to my sons more gently instead of instantly getting “on their case” when problems arise. I desperately need to be an example to them. I am shaping their thoughts and feelings toward the feminine gender, a little bit of a scary thought to be honest, but true. I need to exhibit those qualities that I want my sons to find in their future brides! Wow!

I can’t say that I’m not a little overwhelmed by the idea, it means a complete deviation from my current path and I’m going to need a lot of help from God to make this happen! I have been very blessed and encouraged through praying for my children with more purpose, but I think it is time to add myself into the mix! Praying that the Lord with give me gentleness and peacefulness as I talk with, discipline and love on my sons each day.

Gentleness as a Wife: I am happy to say that this is far less overwhelming. It’s true that I’ve kind of gotten myself into a rut of a little bit of complaining and a “hissy” attitude. I can find ten million things to complain about each day, but I shouldn’t. Gentleness though has never been far away in my relationship with my hubby, I just needed this reminder. I love being able to sit and talk with him or to just hang out and watch a show. I wish we had more time alone together to just connect and relax! I daily need to let go of the day’s frustration and clausterphobia to ensure that my husband’s time at home is refreshing and happy. He works hard to provide for our family, the last thing he needs is me nagging him when he is home.

Thoughts for the journey:

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.” Galatians 5:22-23

“They gave our Master a crown of thorns. Why do we hope for a crown of roses?”
~ Martin Luther ~

I have mentioned before how amazed I am by my surprise when I hit bumps in the road of life. Even though I am never prepared for them I realize that the way I walk through these challenges speaks volumes about who I am. I am often reminded of our Savior who did endure extreme cruelty and performed the ultimate sacrifice for me, small as I am. This quote truly sums up the essence of it all.

Think about it, Satan tried to tempt even Jesus! Why wouldn’t he try to steer us off course? Wouldn’t we be far easier targets?

Immediately the Spirit drove Him into the wilderness. And He was there in the wilderness forty days, tempted by Satan, and was with the wild beasts; and the angels ministered to Him. Mark 1:12

Matthew chapter 4 goes into a lot more detail about His time in the wilderness and how He handled it, and I think that is a perfect example to us in how to handle our own trials and challenges. He used lots of scripture to defeat the temptation, the whole “it is written” routine that we often forget to use!

Reading through Chapter 4 of The Power of A Praying Parent ties right into this as well. The chapter is all about praying for your child to feel loved and accepted. It talks about how we are so often challenged with the absolute lies of the enemy! You aren’t good enough, pretty enough, thin enough, strong enough, smart enough . . . . you get the idea, the lies that our children and even ourselves as adults believe are just that ~ complete LIES!

We have to remember how Christ handled things in His life and even through His death. It was always all about seeking God’s will and having complete faith and trust. I truly believe that the challenges that come along in each of our lives are there for a reason, to strengthen us and to hone us and to remind us that we are only human. But who we become as a result of how we handle each and every challenge and trial . . . that is where the testament of our faith and life lies.

A thought provoking idea as a mom since intimacy in general can be a challenge! I’ll start with the facts: I have 6 children, the twins are 17 mos and still don’t alway sleep well, I attempt to read the Bible daily. Ok, now how does that relate? In every way!

Past: When I became a mom for the first time intimacy in friendships, marriage and my relationship with Jesus seemed pretty much the same. As I had more and more children however most of those relationships cooled off considerably (well, not the marriage one). Then the twins . . . we all adore them and they were truly a gift from God, but they intensified every part of life.

Now: I want to be walking closely by His side each and every day, and that passion has recently been renewed in me (the birth of this blog as a result) - despite or maybe because of my 6 sons. I am finding that the reality is a little more inconsistent than I’d like - though it is much better than it was for many years. I am plodding through many days each week without spending time with my Savior - getting the life-giving Water of truth and renewal of my soul! How will I fulfil his desire and plan for my life - for my sons if I don’t have that direct line of communication open to him? This is what I remind myself of each day.

The Nitty Gritty: To me intimacy with Jesus is as simple as seeking Him and His will each and every day for my life! Allowing Him to speak to me in a real and tangible way by stopping long enough to listen and learning more about Him through His word. So often I try to complicate this with all of the other things that supposedly “make” you closer to God - reality check - they do not create intimacy with the Savior! There is no one set plan, no one right way - there is a relationship between you and Jesus (your Creator and Savior) and that is a very unique and Personal relationship!