Those who are new to homeschooling and have been researching – reading articles, watching videos, joining Facebook groups – have likely stumbled upon the idea that a homeschool can and should be a peaceful environment. Maybe you’ve even gotten the impression that if your homeschool is not peaceful, you’re doing it wrong…. not exactly. The idea of the importance of a peaceful homeschool isn’t wrong per se, but isn’t always reality, and for most of us, we have had time to develop techniques that often work (though not always) for our home.
Kids fight, family members get sick, we all have off days. This is just life.
There are a few things to try that typically make a huge difference steering us onto the road to a much more peaceful environment in our homeschool.
1. Limited media/tech – tech detox. Admittedly, this is crazy difficult in today’s inundation of media and technology, especially when a lot of educational tools do use media. All of that is great, but the issue is, kids need a break. They need to learn to breathe and function without constant access to outside entertainment.
It is so very vital that children learn to use their minds and develop their own creativity, they cannot do this with a constant barrage of noise and visual stimulation. This can be tricky, I absolutely get it and it does require a lot of encouragement on mom’s part as well as a lot more everyday parental involvement for the first few weeks as they adjust.
This is not to say that they will never use media again, or that there cannot be (very) limited exposure during the detox (and I assure you, that is exactly what this is), only that they are taking a media break.
2. Attitude Check: Ok, I’m gonna be honest here, none of us are perfect at this one and sometimes I definitely do not want to do this…. but possibly the most important component in all of this is mom’s attitude. If I’m having a bad day, nothing goes well. If I have a short fuse, we don’t get far. There will be ample opportunities for losing our cool, but the important thing is to maintain a mental monologue reminding yourself of how essential your role as the mom in this situation is.
3. Sibling peace. We have had days of absolute war between brothers around here. It’s going to happen. If you live in some special bubble where your children get along perfectly, great for you! That is not my reality.
Reminding them frequently who the parents are, reminding them of how important character is within the family as well as without. Doing a sibling growth series. There are many options, some solutions can be humorous, some downright challenging.
The point is, once fighting begins it can change the atmosphere for the day. Figuring out how best to manage that for your particular family and children and all their dynamics is key here, understanding that the beauty of homeschooling is flexibility.
4. So I did just mention that flexibility is key. I think one of the best things to ponder when trying to build an atmosphere of peace in the home is Philippians 4:8. Reminding children of all ages of what they SHOULD be focusing on and that it is up to them to learn and grow in this area.
Super simple ways to turn things around…
1. Play worship music (or classical) in the background.
2. Switch gears. Have everyone move on to a new subject or project. Note: Physical exercise and brain breaks are almost always the best ways to clear out the crazy in our house.
3. Switch to individual learning or switch locations/schedule. We love doing subjects as a family, but there are times that they just all feed off each other’s issues and it’s time to split up. If that’s the case, remember flexibility. It’s not the end of the world if you need to end a subject a little early or have everyone work on a different project individually instead of as a group, or just switch up their schedule a bit.
4. Take a break and do a snack and read-aloud time. This can calm things like nothing else. Removing everything else, offering a little snack and a quiet, comfortable place for the kids to hang out while mom reads a book is a fabulous way to fix the overall mood of the house. Note: In a pinch, audiobooks can work – while I am a huge fan of them though, I have found that often they are not nearly as calming as when mom reads the book.
5. Go to the park or on a neighborhood nature walk. Still educational in it’s own way but fresh air and a fresh perspective along with extra space can totally be the answer to a dull day.
So, there it is. A few basic tips to help you change the atmosphere from chaos to calm(er).
Side Note: I realize that I am writing this in the middle of a massive multi-nation-wide quarantine, the likes of which none of us have ever seen, thought was even possible nor are we likely to see it again. There are many reasons right now for discontent within the home and limited ability to do many things. Frankly, almost all of these ideas still apply (except the go to the park one, but going outside your own house still works and if it’s raining, wear boots and a raincoat), in some ways these suggestions may be more necessary than ever as we all so desperately need the calm and peace in our own minds and hearts.
Parents I challenge you to find that peace. To let go of the media frenzy and to embrace calm (frankly, I need a media detox just as much as anyone else right now). I get that this is a challenging time and prone to uncertainty and fear, but none of the negativity surrounding all of this is going to be beneficial to ourselves, our home or our family in any way. I pray all of you stay healthy and calm through it all! God Bless!